flora and fauna

The other day I hopped in the car to go pick up Eric from work. As I was heading into town I felt something tickling my leg. I looked down and a rather large spider was crawling up my ankle. Suppressing arachnophobic panic and a strong desire to drive the car off a cliff I managed to slow the car and shake the spider off my leg and under my shoe. I continued on my way with phantom creepy crawlies prickling all over me. When I reached Eric, I joked that I had almost got into an accident on my three minute drive because of a spider. Eric usually sneers a bit at my fear of spiders, but I insisted that it was a really big one and no laughing matter. Holding back his eye roll we got back into the car, but before we drove any where I ordered him to remove the body of the dead spider (I didn't want it coming back to life and eating me). He glanced around on the floor grabbed one of its black legs and pulled it out. I punctuated this ceremony with faux girly squeals, but felt a real shiver of panic when he flipped the black bulbous body over to reveal the perfect red hour glass on its belly.

Hello Mrs. Widow.